Ordinary sentiment, ordinary words; put together in a way which captures and exalts the emotion. "Til my pulses stop"; easily understood. Some form of the meaning is common, cliche even. ‘Be still my heart, ‘racing pulses’, hearts that ‘skip a beat’; these and more are all part of our cardiovascular vernacular. But to put the words together in that way, so close to what is familiar, but not. It gives the phrasing a startling freshness which is met with immediate recognition.

Millay was an artistic genius an intellectual romantic; with emphasis on ‘artist’ and ‘romantic. She never tried to impress with tricked out words. She communicated in plain language on topics of love, death nature artistic integrity.  And with such beauty and ingenuity. Amazing. There’s no one like her. Let your mind wearied with thinking doze upon that thought.

True story:

I call my (sort of ) business partner about some old, unfinished business in which we were partnering. I hadn’t spoken with him in over a year, no falling out or anything, we just hadn’t found a new product to work on together yet. We did the whole howdy-doody-how’s-it-going-what’s-new-with-you rigmarole. And suddenly, it was no longer rigmarole..but incredibly an incredibly important conversation. Perhaps one of the most important of my life.

I say’ what’s new?’ To which he responds with a little story about his usual line of business and follows up with ‘It looks like I’m going to start producing films.’ Okay…this is a mere 4 days after my Overstock.com insanity to get my film production process going. I responded quite intelligently I thought. I said, something erudite and smooth like, ‘That’s the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard’, and then begin quietly freaking out. He and I by the way, always seem to arrive separately on the same page at the same time, and then one of us picks up the phone, this is by no means the first time something like this has happened.

The long and short of it is . . . I have financing for Bakery’s first film. How outrageous is that! I’m lovin’ it. As in. Completely. All profits go directly into The Bakery’s coffers to fund book publications, and the artist programs I’ve been dying to offer ever since we started. So…yay us!

Tags: independent film, bakery of the poets, movies, filmmaking, funding

Actually, no . . . I can’t wait. I had this idea for a movie..have had for years, and now with  my new ‘If I Fail…Fail Spectacularly’ mind set I thought, ‘Why the heck not?’ Give it the old college try.

My brain turned to first steps of lawyers and screenplays and incorporation and coming up with the green to make the bus go. One of the ideas was to do an online auction featuring these fabulous little getaway packages put together by a Charity Villas LLC specifically for nonprofits. But where, oh where, to list the auction? That’s when I made my third mistake (the first and second being to surf the web in the middle of the night with ‘ideas’ brewing in my brain) of downloading Overstock.com’s listing software.

It seemed like a brilliant idea at the time, create the listing now and fine tune it over the next week or so while laying the groundwork for the auction itself. . . promoting it, etc. Well. . .don’t ask how (’cause I don’t know) some how I managed to list the darn trip . . . twice. I soon discovered that though I could cancel the items, I would be charged for listing them anyway…and given the high-ticket reserve . . . um . . . they ain’t cheap. So my dearly darlings if you are or know anyone who is hankering after a 4 day, 3 night stay at the Hyatt Regency in SF w/ airfare included please point them in the direction of our first auction…or the second.

Here are the links to the auctions; each one a 4 day, 3 night stay at the Hyatt Regency in San Francisco.
1. http://auctions.overstock.com/item/42056186
2.http://auctions.overstock.com/item/42055003

Tags: vacations, hyatt regency, auctions, overstock.com, bakery of the poets, filmmaking

I’ve always felt there was glory in Attempt. Something beautiful and even sacred in the process of inspiration and bringing an idea into reality. But I’ve always held my hand . . . attempted, but without really risking enough to either succeed or fail completely. So many dreams deferred, but none ridden into the dust of defeat or soaring on the wings of victory; but always that bizarre purgatory of . . . almost or . . . eventually.

Next steps, geographically at any rate will most probably see me in Holland before the year is out, either temporarily or permanently. What next for Maya/de Bergerac . . . the kid herself? Well, if you know your cinema history that last sentence was a bit of a hint. What should be my next goal?

The only thing I know for certain is that I’m tired of whiny whimper-y half-keistered failure. The ones that make it hard put for anyone to blame me for the situation, even if they can’t fully comprehend the circumstances. I’m also sick of half-stepped victory, the ones where I execute a ‘unique’ idea ‘wisely’ (French, for a watering down brilliant inspiration) and get part of what I want, but not the whole enchilada. I still look like an ‘eccentric’ to my more straight-laced friends without having felt either the cleansing burn of an idea going up in flames or the vindication of victory.

So for my next number, I’ve decided on a new motto. If I fail . . . fail spectacularly.

He-hee, the very thought makes me giggle like a schoolgirl. What a thrill. My entire life has felt like a high-wire act attempting to balance my own nature against the desire to act, and be seen to act, wisely. My natural wish to get out and do something astonishing has always been tempered by a wish to blend; which, um . . . I never have, but ‘hope springs’ . . you know. The rational I think was that as long as I acted wisely and was seen to do so, how ever ‘out there’ the plan I’d been working on seemed to others, I would always have a safety net when I really needed it. It’s in the unspoken family contract.

Now I say, what the hay.